the story of growing up Scroggins

Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Unexpected Wonderfulness

Yesterday our playgroup made a field trip to the Gainesville Zoo. It's a smallish zoo, but perfect for the little ones to walk around and see the coyotes and monkeys (I mentioned it was a small zoo.) We fed the goats; Grady thought they were so sweet.



The weather was so perfect. It reminded me of one of those days in college when we would go out to research park and sleep under a tree all afternoon. There were a few lucky people out there doing just that, but we were able to relax while the kids played the day away. Grady basked in the glory of two girls fighting for his attention on the tire swing, and all the excitement exhausted him. He crashed after I picked up the older kids from school-a late nap, but a nap much needed.
The day was just so...nice. The drive up there sharing books, the walk through the zoo, and the play in the park. Unexpected wonderfulness.

DHS Homecoming

We supported our Eagles on Friday by attending the Homecoming Parade and Pep Rally. Grady thought it was so super fun to watch everyone walk by and throw candy. Tanner was, of course, all about the candy. Madison was actually in the parade as a pee-wee cheerleader. She didn't fall out of the pick up she was riding in, which was a bonus. We walked all over the square getting to our designated watching and cheering spots. While the pre-parade waiting did get a little hairy, I think it was a successful afternoon. We came home to a lazy Friday night, and look forward to more Homecomings...especially that parade and candy business.






Thursday, September 25, 2008

MDO Saga

No tears today!!!! O happy day!!

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Mama, I need help...

This afternoon Grady was watching some horse movie from Todd's mom. He came into the kitchen asking me for "hep". I followed him into my room and he proceeded to jump at the TV. "Mama, I want with the horses." (paraphrasing).

"So, Grady, you want me to help you jump into the TV with the horses?"

"Yes-I love the horsies!"

"Grady, you can't jump into the TV...it's just to watch."

"awwwwww....man!"

What do I do with that?

General Update

So, the crick in my neck isn't completely well, but at least I can function and turn my head. Major bonus.

Secondly, Tuesday and Thursday MDO dropoff is about to give me an emotional breakdown. When we pulled up Thursday, Grady said he wanted to go to "Mommy's home". Today we pulled up and again, he wanted to "hold you" and "stay with me". I got him a little motivated by letting him lead the way. I put on his backpack and he showed me the way...where to put "my lunch", "my backpack", and then led me to the potty. We got to his class and I sat on the floor to play cars and tried to get him engaged. When I got up to leave he crawled up my leg and wanted me to "stay with him." He cried...

I'm thinking of pulling him out for now. I didn't put the other two in MDO this little, and while I enjoy the extra hours on my own to spend being productive, I can live without them. I'm so conflicted because when Tanner and Madison were in this little stage we had so much more time at home, and time to spend with friends. Now with the older two in school, our days are chopped up in schedules, and sometimes I just don't have the time to do all the crafting or playgrouping I would like to (although we do meet our friends Wednesday mornings). We have our little routine, but I just don't feel it's as rich as it could be. I'm wondering if maybe I should just wait a year, or if that would make his little anxieties that much more. I just know these tear-jerker days devastate me.

He might just be working me too because when I've picked him up the past few weeks the teachers have had only good things to say. So there's that...and then there's the tears, with the result being my conflict of heart.

Monday, September 22, 2008

Pain in the Neck

I want to cry.

I have an official crick in my neck. Never had one of those before-they pretty much suck. Not only can I not turn my head to the right, but I can't even straighten my neck without wanting to claw my eyeballs out and scream in pain.

I've taken a cocktail of pain medication throughout the day-so not helping.

The only highlight of the injury (?) is when I winced in pain during put-Grady-down-for-nap, he rubbed my neck and asked if that made it better. When it didn't, he gave it a little kiss. It didn't work, but it would have been cool if it did.

Runaround Sue

We met in 8th grade. I was new to Decatur...a "move in", and I'm pretty sure she admired my fringe jacket and tie-dyed shirt. If she didn't back then, she's learned to appreciate the style by now. :) Throughout high school we shared drill team dances, girls' nights, double dates, study habits...college took us down different roads, but we shared some great roadtrips. Ironically, she was Todd's first 'real' girlfriend, but as one of my best friends, stood up for us at our wedding. It was at her baby shower I officially let the world know Madison was on the way.

Now we are living parallel lives as we raise our families in smallish towns. Hers is in Stillwater, mine here in the metropolis of Decatur. We both are juggling kids, stay-at-home vs. working mommyhoood, new family traditions, and family matriarch training. :)

This weekend Brandi made the roadtrip with her youngest, Audrey. They were here on business-to do some Grandparent bonding, but got to crash at my place. They got in Friday night after 10, and we stayed up until after 2AM chatting the night away! Her first question: "how do you live here???" I explained the adjustment of being an adult on the same paths I was a teen...and she....didn't really believe me when I said it was neat. :) I don't even remember all we talked about that night, just how easy and comfortable it was.

Saturday was the same mellow wonderfulness as we sat on the back porch with our bottles of wine and watched the kids hike through the back pasture. We tried to rally Saturday night, but one great thing about great friends is being able to wimp out. We crashed before the news on SNL. Ain't no shame either. Sadly, they had to leave Sunday morning and, as soon as they left, Madison was making plans for their next visit. Brandi promised it would not be long. I hope not.

I might have to pull out the Slumber Party or Senior Lip Sync videos as blackmail...

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Salt Mines

So, I've been subbing this week. The same school that I subbed in last year called me for a few days this week. It was nice being in that school again since it was so familiar. This time I was in a 6th grade science room. SO MUCH BETTER than a 5th grade Language Arts room. I was in my element, and all the fun parts of teaching washed over me. I talked about the metric system, and helped the students through a test...I saw a few students from last year and they came up to hug me and tell me all about their summer...Today I taught a lab and watched as the kids rubbed their brain cells together to have a very painful-problem-solving-thought. I love making them think. So fun.

I've scored another long term sub position for the spring. One of the teachers I taught with last year is having a baby and requested I be her sub. That's so nice too-to be acknowledged and wanted for a set of skills. Sometimes I forget I have skills-or rather, sometimes I wonder if I have any skills at all.

I remember Barbie saying Math is hard. She was wrong. Motherhood is.

Monday, September 15, 2008

Birthday Blast

Happy Birthday to ME! Yesterday, I celebrated my 33rd birthday. Thirty-three years old. I remember when my mom turned 33ish. She was pregnant with my sister, and I was in first grade-ish (ok, so I don't remember the EXACT dates and events, but the general era I do recall.) Madison is in second grade now, so I guess she'll remember me at this age too. Funny thing is that my mom seems the same to me now as she did then, not necessarily older-just older than me. My grandparents never seemed older either-just older than my parents. Come to think of it, my sister never seemed older either-just younger than me. I may have an age perception issue.

In any case, I had a wonderful birthday. The weekend started with the first Decatur Home Football Game...a "Hope Floats" moment in progress. Grady watched the football fly across the field; Tanner conversed with the men about the plays during the game (seriously), and Madison kept her eye on the crowd looking for her next social engagement. As my friend Jennifer and I corralled the kids, our better halves parked cars. Todd is second in charge of that for the Lion's Club-yep, it takes TWO to lead the club in parking those cars, but I'm starting to babble...
Saturday morning we watched Tanner in his second official Little League Tball game. He's doing so much better than he did when he was three. We must have been on some good crack when we signed him up 2 years ago. He hit the ball twice without the tee, and EVEN watched ATTENTIVELY when he was in the outfield. Todd and his BFF, Jason, were coaching the team, and I had to laugh watching them pitch and catch. It was only a mere 15ish years ago that I sat watching them do the same thing for ol' DHS. This time their children were at homeplate instead of a rival team. Another "Hope Floats" moment to add to the birfday weekend.














Then we headed home to hunker down for Ike. The clouds were rolling in, and we were expecting floods out the whazoo. This wouldn't have been the first time a hurricane celebrated my birthday with me. When I was 13, we evacuated Corpus Christi for Hurricane Gilbert. We boarded up and drove to Beeville, a previous home, and I watched the clouds form spirals. It was eerie then, and it was almost as ominous this time. Only I was here, and my sister and some friends were down there. Not my favorite part of their evacuation plan-but I'm babbling again. Saturday night, we celebrated with my parents over dinner, brownies, and conversation centering on such hurricanes. After dinner we had some Sangria and cake with Shelly and Jared and Co. The Sangria/Benadryl cocktail lulled me into a wonderful birthday sleep.

As luck would have it, we woke up Sunday morning to blue skies and perfect weather. After checking in with all my hurricane survivors, and leaving Grady with Gran, we headed to Six Flags with some friends to celebrate not only my birthday-but their birthday. The hands of fate recently plopped some super fun friends in our lap, and just to make sure we got the hint-fate gave us the same birthday.

We caught up with eachother at the bobsled, and started the day o' fun. We had a variety of kid ages tagging along...but they seemed to mesh during the Aquaman ride. Nothing like getting shlopping wet to bring you together I guess. After that, it was wheels off. The big kids (I'm talking about Todd here) went running to Batman, Mr. Freeze, the Texas Giant, the Shockwave...I'm not sure the others went willingly, or gave into Todd's peer pressure. He's kind of a pro-peer-pressurer. I probably should have warned them.
I'm a little wimpish on those rides, so I was glad to have Julie-a fellow wimp. We volunteered to take the littler ones to Looney Toon Land, the Train, and the log ride. Equally as fun-promise. There were a few tense moments of discontented attitudes and nervous tummies...



But our map reading skills, powers of negotiation, and determination saw us through. We ended the day on the Pei Wei Patio (scaring off other would-be diners) splurging on good food and homemade birthday cake courtesy of Sharyn.
It's been a few years since I truly celebrated my birthday, and I must admit this day gets a 'blast' rating. Randy and Quinn-I did not know I was looking for birthday pals, but I'm glad Fate knew what I needed in leading me to you. She knows how much those "Hope Floats" days make my heart smile and my aura giggle.
On the other hand, She might just be making up for that Gilbert evacuation. No babbling.

Thursday, September 11, 2008

My Pick Up Man

Today, Todd left driving this:


And came home driving this:



He took advantage of all the smart people dumping their trucks, and snatched up this snazzy one. Apparently he has been in a depressed state driving the Yaris, and now his manliness is back intact.

Bipolar

My kids make me bipolar.

Yesterday was a horrible-no-good-very-terrible-bad-day in the life of Madison, Tanner, and Grady's mom. Each kid had something that irked me, making me feel ineffective. Madison had sloppy issues at gymnastics (big surprise), Tanner wouldn't mind (his skull is 10 inches thick most of the time), and Grady must have had 352 accidents. These are just the highlights. Last night I went to bed wondering how I was possibly going to get these kids grown up to be happy, healthy, productive members of society. blah blah blah.

Today, on the other hand, was a lovely-wonderful-very-great-day in the life of Madison, Tanner, and Grady's mom. The kids were darn near perfect...as perfect as they can be anyway. First, I know you are wondering (all 5 of you that read this) how Grady's second day at MDO went. Well, it went just peachy. I picked him up and EVERYONE was smiles. His teachers told me there was not a single tear the entire day, AND he took a nap, AND he went potty, AND he gave them a goodbye hug. Not only that, but he told me the rest of the day when he wanted to go potty. Imagine. During Grady's wonderful day at school, I volunteered in Tanner's class. The entire time I was there Tanner was just beaming. He did exactly what his teacher told him to do THE FIRST TIME SHE TOLD HIM. When I left, he gave me a hug and told me he loved me. Imagine that! Madison's lazy sloppy ways must have gotten on her own nerves, and SHE CLEANED HER ROOM WITHOUT BEING ASKED. She gave me a goodnight hug and kiss, and told me I was the best mommy ever. I must be imagining.

Now, given the flip-flop of these two days, how is a mom supposed to stay sane? Just when I think I've done something right...WHAM...not so much. Up. Down. Up. Down. Up. Down.

Isn't that the definition of bipolar? Maybe I'm already there....

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

I remember...

7 years ago those planes hit the towers.

I awoke and dressed for school. I wore a black skirt, red blazer, and heels. Todd dropped Madison at her babysitter, and I drove to school listening to a CD instead of the radio. I always listened to the radio, but that day I just didn't. No reason. I arrived at school and didn't check my email. I always checked email first. Instead, I set up for a lecture and lab on Protein Synthesis. Overhead in place, lab equipment set, I finally sat down to my computer. The first email I opened read "a plane just accidently flew into the tower in New York." I didn't understand. I had a TV in my room, so I turned on the news and watched the events unfold as my students entered the classroom.

Together, we didn't understand. We thought it was an accident, a terrible terrible accident. We tried to make sense of how something like this could have happened. I muted the TV and started my lesson. In the middle of RNA Transcription, one of my students gasped as another plane hit the building. We stopped and watched the news again. We still thought there was something wrong with the planes. We still thought it was an accident.

Again, I muted the TV and continued my lesson. We got to RNA translation I think-and another plane hit the Pentagon. I felt it hit my chest. We closed our books. I sat in a student desk with my kids around me, and we just watched. Now we knew; this was no accident. One student started crying. Another tried to figure out who and why this was happening. They all asked me their questions. They all expected me to have the answers.

Those kids knew me well. This was the second time I had the opportunity to teach them; I had them when I taught 7th grade. They watched me co-teach with some of my best friends. They knew my passion, my love for them and my job. It was because of these kids that I had the courage to move to the high school to teach Freshman Biology. I knew I would have these kids, and I looked forward to it. We were old friends, and I didn't want to let them down. I wanted to have those answers too.

The bell rang, and first period ended. My kids left my classroom, and my conference period began. Like everyone else in the country, I got on my cell phone and began to check in with my people. First, I had to know if my dad was in the air. He flew for Delta, and I had no idea where he could be. I had no idea if he was at work or out golfing. It took over an hour, but eventually I talked to him. He was home. He was safe. I started shaking. Next, I called my babysitter. I told her I would be home as soon as I could. She was upset. Finally, I drove over to my old school and hugged my old friends. I needed a safety net. We all needed a safety net.

The bell rang again, and third period started. Another class of kids entered my room, and we talked through the day's events. We prayed, and again, I tried to start my lesson. An announcement was made. We had to evacuate the building; there had been a bomb threat. We gathered ourselves and made our way outside. There were no planes in the air. We waited and waited. Chaos. Organized chaos. Finally, the school day ended.

I sprinted to my car, blasted the speed limit, and raced to get Madison. I could not to get her fast enough. I needed to see her, hold her, and let her know that everything would be ok. She was 3 months old. I scooped her up and drove home. I called Todd and asked him to come home early. I called my dad and asked for an explanation. I looked at Madison and hoped for safety.

I know the days and weeks that followed were surreal for everyone. American flags sold out. Everyone was proud to be an American. Firemen flocked to New York. Everyone prayed for survival and reunion. It was a humbling day seeing our Country attacked. It was a sobering day seeing our kids scared. I think of those kids every year on September 11th. I remember our naked skies, and I pray we remember our naked eyes. I am still in awe of our delicate life, and I will always be proud to be an American.

Attack of the Hummingbirds


Yesterday, Grady and I went out to the garage, only to find some pretty stressed out hummingbirds. That in itself is enough to post. Just imagine. I wouldn't say hummingbirds are known for their laid back mentality. Here they were stuck in our garage. I finally concluded they decided our Tball stand was a giant bird feeder. They kept flying over to it, hovering about, wishing for some sweet nectar. I became acutely aware of their frustrating disappointment. During their frustration, they flew into the ceiling, garage door, walls, car...anything that got in their way. They must be blind little creatures. I'd never heard hummingbirds chirp, but they chattered away during this entire process. I'm pretty sure they were cussing. Cussing my garage, and perhaps even me as I tried to get a picture of their wacky breakdown. Quite difficult little creatures to capture on film, and another example of perhaps why I "need" one of those fancy SLR cameras. My birthday is in 4 days. I'm just sayin'. :)

We tried to coax them out the large garage door opening, but they would have nothing of it. Grady thought it was hilarious. Chrissy thought it was a challenge. She deceptively camoflauged herself amongst Todd's tools, and planned her attack. You can barely see her, right?
Those birds were there ALL DAY. We kept checking on them, sure they'd made their escape, only to find them bumping and chirping. Finally, as the evening hours approached, I guess their curfews beckoned and they problem solved their way out. Grady was disappointed, Chrissy was exhausted, and I was relieved. I'm not sure how much more hummingbird stress I could handle.

Monday, September 8, 2008

Disclaimer

It has been brought to my attention that the views I express on this here forum are in some way skewed. It seems that I tend to portray my own personal roles, duties, hobbies, blah blah blah in an extraordinary light, and yet not so much when I talk about Todd. I want to take this opportunity to apologize PROFUSELY for such a thing! I would never have told a story with the intention of casting a shadow over the wonderful husband that is my Todd.

I will now take this opportunity to brag:

Todd takes the kids to school almost everyday. Just this morning he drove away with a screaming Madison as she complained about having to wear "nice clothes" and SHOES. (I'm the meanest mom ever by the way.) He also picks the kids up on Tuesdays and Fridays; this allows me 2 days where I don't have to worry about Grady's naptime, and it is truly wonderful. He mows the grass. He waters the grass. He worries about the grass. He updates my IPOD list, and will load my IPOD when I ask him (especially Coldplay songs). He "keeps our books", and thus keeps us on track with our spending and finances. He monitors my Sonic Diet Coke runs, which probably saves us 50$ a year. He kills bugs. He cleans up all gross messes. (I won't elaborate here, except to say that we have 2 dogs, a cat, and 3 kids.) He's funny. He reads the kids bedtime stories most nights as I tutor. He thinks I'm pretty. He's a little clumsy, but is a great problem solver. (I cite all fire and trailor episodes here.) He's a great brother to Michelle, and near perfect son for his mom. He coaches Tanner's Tball team, and practices with both boys as often as he can. He's a member of the Lion's Club, and truly wants to volunteer and help his community. He was the inspiration for our "live, work, and play in the same town mentality". He accounts for the hospital, and is dern good at it. He prays all the time. He loves his family, and is an awesome dad.

I guess to make this post complete I should point out my own shortcomings, but I'll save that for later. For now-just note that Todd isn't always the absent-minded-professor.

Just most of the time. :)

Sunday, September 7, 2008

Church Clothes

So, our get-ready-for-church-routine involves Todd getting the boys ready, and me getting Madison ready. Works well most of the time. In theory, since Todd is in charge of the boys, he would also be in charge of the bag of tricks that keeps Grady amused during Church. But like I said, that's a theory, and I digress.

We are usually rushing out of the house to get to church at least 5 minutes late. Why we can't get to church one day a week at 10:30, but we manage to get to school everyday at 8 is beyond me, but that's how it is...I usually grab the said bag of tricks (stuffing as I go), usher kids out the door, and slap some lipgloss on as I guzzle a diet coke.

Today after we parked, I open the door to unstrap Grady, and he doesn't have on shoes. His little socked feet are just dangling from the car seat. Feet with socks. For Church. I looked at Todd and asked where Grady's shoes were. Blank Stare. I repeat-Todd, honey, where are the shoes that Grady will wear today? Second Blank Stare. Final Answer: UUmmm....OH! on the desk at home, when I....

I left it at that. We went into Church 7 minutes late, stuffed bag-of-tricks in hand, smeared lip gloss from Grady's most recent "love", Tanner running for the restroom, Todd lecturing on "appropriate Church behavior", Grady without shoes...

and the cherry on the Sunday of my day-we passed my parents on the way in. We didn't even casually slip in-totally busted for crazy tardiness.

We are so dysfunctional.

Saturday, September 6, 2008

First Day Woes...

So, like I said, Grady started MDO on Thursday. Here we are all smiles, and pumped for "Grady's School." He really was so excited; he opened his lunchbox on the drive and was amazed at "Grady's lunch."

"Wow Mama-look at Grady's lunch!"

We walked in, found his class, put his backpack by his name, and he started playing. His teacher said he was doing really well. She even asked me if I always dropped him somewhere! I explained a few necessities, such as the infamous "night night" ever so important in Grady's world, his nap palet, and that was it. I left. My eyes were a little swollen with excess moisture, but we were good. He was good. Relief.

I went to Wal-Mart. ALL BY MYSELF!! It was luxurious. I can't even explain the silent wonderment of the shopping experience. I was able to use my list and coupons without reaching for and opening an alcoholic beverage of choice. Not that I usually do-I just usually REALLY WANT TO by the time it's all said and done. After that I spent the afternoon with friends having lunch and *a-hem* "discussing" our book for book club that night. :-) It felt a little self indulgent, and I had to talk myself into enjoying the "time off", but no bon bons-not yet anyway.

Pick up time was at 2. I tentatively made my way to Grady's class, and when I saw the teacher I knew. "Grady had a really hard day." O God. My fears were coming true. He was the worst kid in the history of MDO. She said he really missed "his mommy", and that at one point she told him "it's ok to cry, but you really have to stop screaming." She said he did, and there were moments of happiness out on the playground and at lunch, but overall-lots and lots of crying. I felt terrible. I felt terrible that he had such a sad day, and that the teachers had such a trying day with him! I felt terrible that he missed me. :(

I want him to go and have fun-he needs to learn it's ok to just be Grady. He needs to learn that I'm not quite as wonderful as he thinks!! (Just ask ANYONE!) He needs to learn that OTHER people can (gasp) make sippy cups, run on the playground, take him potty, share toys, put him to nap, make him lunch...blah blah blah. He needs to learn all this, and I need to learn how to teach him. Madison and Tanner knew this from Day 1; somehow Grady didn't get the memo.

Next Thursday we go again. Hopefully in the meantime he will get the memo. I'll mark it urgent.

Friday, September 5, 2008

where is...

So Todd's parents have been "fulltiming it" in New Mexico the last month, and we've been taking care of their yard, filling the bird feeders, etc.-just tending to their house. It's been a little confusing for Grady; he just doesn't get why Gran and Papa aren't there. "It's Papa's house, right?" he tells me. We keep telling him they are on vacation, but I guess when you're 2 everyday is a little like vacation. Here's a little snippet of a conversation I just had with him:

"Where is Madison?"

"school."

"Where is Tanner?"

"school." (He seems to understand the schedule now, but still misses them.)

"Where is Daddy?"

"work."

"Where is Aunt Patti?"

"the city." (!!-I was a little surprised he made that connection.)

"Where is Gran?"

**crickets**

"Where is Gran?"

"Gran's gone."

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Tomorrow I will eat Bon Bons...

or so Todd thinks.

Actually, tomorrow Grady starts Mother's Day Out-MDO for those in the "know" . I'm so nervous for him!! I'm so nervous for me too. We've been talking up going to "school", and he sees Tanner and Madison go everyday. He's armed with a brand new "Ka-Chow" backpack and lunchbox, which are both packed with yummies and lovies.

I'm a little worried he'll get kicked out. I'm sure he won't mind, probably won't potty where or when he's supposed to, definitely won't nap, and most likely won't share. I'm worried he'll cry when I drop him off-I know he will. We've been joined at the hip since the infamous hospital stay last summer. I know he needs this time away from me, to learn independence from me and our little safe haven of a family. Otherwise-Lord help us in kindergarten.

I guess I'm a little sad too. He's getting so big so fast-he's not so much a baby anymore, although the fits he throws would prove otherwise! He's on his way to being 3 years old-on his way to being a kid. I guess sometimes I just want to wrap my arms around him and not let go.

I mean, who would want to let go of this?

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

Down in Fragglerock....

Labor Day weekend is usually our official goodbye to summer. Goodbye to swimming, boating, popsicles, camping, and that hot summer sun. Hello to Fall!! Welcome back pumpkins, school, football, and wonderfully cooler weather.

This particular Long Weekend we spent on the lake with our friends Shelly and Jared. Basically, we met up, took the boats out to a secluded spot, and let the kids jump off the boats for hours and hours. It took intense planning on the part of all the Adults involved to achieve this intricate set of weekend plans. Promise. You can observe the wind blown kids below-"fragglerocking" as we call it 'round these parts. OH! AND these friends, this Shelly and Jared, they have Rock Band. This house is pretty dern jealous.