a reflection on time management

Last Friday, I finished up my 6 week long term sub gig in 6th grade Science. People kept asking me if I was super pumped about my "last day", and to be honest, it just kind of came and went without fanfare or hoopla. When I told the kids it was my last day, some jaws actually dropped at how fast the time had gone. I took that as a good sign in that I provided a somewhat nice transition between teachers, and that the kids weren't counting down the days until the "crazy sub" left. :) Some were super sweet and asked me to stay-that they would even miss me, and others, well, I know they did a little happy dance to see me go. Remember, these were 6th graders. But overall, I have to say that I really enjoyed being back in my 'element' (hehe, science nerd joke), teaching my favorite things and getting to know these kids. I enjoyed the daily adult conversation, the schedule, the creativity, and the surprises of everyday. Todd even had lunch with me a few times, and the smirk on his face when he watched me teach told me I was totally back in my groove, which was also a nice feeling.

That being said, our life had its total crazy moments while Todd and I constantly coordinated our schedules to complete the endless to-do lists. Not that our life doesn't always have crazy moments-this was just a new kind of crazy. I had to learn to let go of a clean house and a made bed. We both had to learn to problem solve mealtime with an incomplete pantry. Laundry was never ending, and free time was a new kind of luxury. I missed a kindergarten field trip, rarely worked out, and cutting my hair? Impossible.

Transitioning back into "home life" these past 2 days has been interesting. It seems that no matter which hat I'm wearing, time management is my greatest weakness. Monday morning stretched endlessly before me as I made my mental to do list. I thought I had plenty of time to sit for breakfast, play a little Star Wars with Grady, watch a little Dora, take a little inventory of my flowerbeds, and take Marley on a little walk. Before I knew it, it was 11:30, Todd was headed home for lunch, and I hadn't showered or made myself presentable in any way. I realized if I had been at school, I would have already taught 4 classes. As it stood at home, I had spastically started some laundry, made a bed or two, and put away 2 of the 4 breakfast dishes. How unproductive can a person be?? Now, because of my crazy need for productivity and order, as a SAHM, I have learned to submerge myself in an array of sanity-saving plans for both me and the kids. Because of their structure, I am quite the advocate for these playgroups and other activities, but on this particular day, ADD took over. I also have to admit though, this was not the first time a day got away from me before a brush met my hair. But, snuggling and playing with Grady for the morning-also a nice feeling.

My point? I might not have one. I just know that both sides of the coin are equally frustrating and fulfilling. I see women, moms, and even dads having the working vs. staying home discussion all the time, and most of the time I see tempers flaring. I see women getting defensive and hurt; I see moms putting their collective arms around their children and desperately hoping for wisdom as they take each step deeper into motherhood. My conclusion: there is no right answer to this debate; there is only your answer, and I wish that as women and mothers we were more accepting of that fact. I wish it felt like we were all on the same side, and no matter a person's choice in hats, we all embraced motherhood, eachother, and most importantly, ourselves with acceptance, tenderness, and understanding. I suppose that's my point-there are ups and downs to so many things in this crazy world, wouldn't it be great if we all held on to eachother for the ride?